Tuesday, September 26, 2006


Earlier today I was talking about seeing beauty in everything… well, that only lasted so long today… it disappoints me too because I haven’t let my co-worker get to me in a while… for the most part, I’ve been calm, cool, and collected (in all situations, not just work)… even regarding situations that I might have previously considered stressful… well, I’m sure I would have let them stress me out… r was even stressing me out today… he isn’t anymore, my co-worker isn’t either, but I did have to go to my happy place to get out of the mess… I’m not in a great mood but I’m not in near as bad of a mood as I was in… I managed to let him crawl all over my nerves!! Now I’m not only disappointed with myself, I’m just amazed at how he acts… before I started really working on changing my attitude and myself, when I would be so “mean” to my co-worker, I was basically really short with him… that was it… no nasty comments or snide remarks… no being absolutely hateful to him… I just made it clear that I didn’t want to carry on a conversation with him (even though that didn’t stop him)… I really am trying to be the better person in this situation and not play his stupid little games… though I must say, he has started acting a lot nicer since he knows that he pissed me off… it’s like he was trying everything under the sun to make me mad and he wasn’t going to be happy until he did… that’s ok though… there’s no use in beating myself up because I let him get to me, I’m sure that’s what he wants me to do! Anyways, I just wanted to vent a little bit… get it out of my system that I was pissed but I’m ok with it now… I’m not sure if it’s possible to be happy 100% of the time or not… my plan though is to be happy as close to 100% of the time as I can be… I know that as I practice and learn to live my life this way it will get easier and better… each moment is a new moment and an opportunity to change something if you need or want too….

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