Something Different

Like always, as I recently discovered, my thoughts are crazy and all over the place… so last night on the way home from my massage I decided that I was just going to call dc and get it over with… do you remember that super sick rolling nauseous feeling you got the first time a boy called you or you called a boy… like, I would rather be doing anything in the world besides this right now… I start feeling that and I’m like, omg, what is my problem?!? I’ve known dc since we were like little…I can call him to say hi… I don’t know if it’s wrong or not… I feel like it is and that’s why I’m justifying it… I just really want to talk to him- you know, you can’t have it so you want it thing… honestly, now that he’s been on my mind for about 4 days straight, I really think if he does call me back, he’ll be an ass… which is fine… closure. Oh yeah, I had to leave a message… it was apparently his “business” line… the house next door to his parent’s… I think him and his dad (maybe) went into business?!?! And most embarrassing, I called three times… the first time my ear bud died (on my way home right after I decided I had to call him), called him from home, the 1st time, got the answering machine and could barely hear the message so I hung up… it took me a little but I managed to put two and two together and realized that must be the business line… what the hell, I called again, yes, again, I know, how desperate is that, I only hope they don’t have caller id, by this time I had worked myself up into a crazy frenzy and have no idea what I said on the message… I remember some of it but not all of it… but, it’s out of my hands now, his move… Now every time the phone rings I get nervous… why does this boy intimidate me like this?!?!
Anyways, today I think (hope) that R and I are going to go to Atwood’s, technically it’s called a “ranch and home” store but they have so much more than just that… I want to maybe get some flowers for this little flower bed in the front of the house… R wants a new weed eater… plus, I’ve never been and I really want to go, R said I would love it… so I’m super excited about this and really hope he’ll feel like going when he gets home from work… he’s been hectic already today! And bonus, I have no work to do this weekend other than CT payroll… very nice!!!

I’ll let you know how Atwood’s is… I can only imagine your excitement- a farm and ranch store!