S.A.D.

i know that there is seasonal anxiety disorder (or something like that) but i think i may have another type of S.A.D... social anxiety disorder... this morning i was thinking how much i would love to work from home but how good for me would that be? probably not very considering i hardly ever leave the house anyways... usually, if i have something to do and don't do it right after work before i get home it usually doesn't get done... once i'm home, i'm home to stay... this weekend i left the house twice, once for food and once for ice cream... if i wouldn't have been pms-ing and craving something sweet (BAD!!) i probably wouldn't even have left for ice cream... if i worked at home, i would probably never leave the house... going to the store would be a major challenge for me... (sometimes it still kinda is)... i can't remember if i've always been this way or if it's something that has developed over maybe the past few years... i would say large groups of people intimidate me... not even so much large groups of people, pretty much any amount of people over like 4 or maybe 6, depending on who the six are.... i wonder if anyone else feels this way... (i really think this is another reason i ddin't go to my 10 year reunion)... it's crazy but even family that i haven't seen in a while intimidates me... like at christmas, whew, talk about anxiety... seeing family that i haven't seen in usually about a year, even though they're family & once i get there and get comfortable it's usually not too bad, it still gives me bad anxiety... i suppose this is something else that i need to tap on...
daddy says that if you can conquer your fear you can conquer the world (that is scary!!)... mom's reply, it looks like i won't be conquering the world (they were talking about her fear of heights)...